When+You+Can't+Beat+'Em,+Try+to+Make+Excuses

=**//__When You Can't Beat 'Em, Try to Make Excuses __//**= = = media type="file" key="Sack attack.mp3"

= Introduction: =

Ambiguous relationships between characters, like Abraham and Isaac, litter Genesis and allow the reader to decipher them however they wish. In this case, Mr. Calvin chose to take a more humorous route when describing the interaction between the patriarch and his son. Because of his devotion to God, Abraham faces an impossible choice when God commands him to sacrifice his son. When he proves that he will do it, God stops him at the last moment and relief floods Abraham's mind. Of course, Isaac did not know what was going on and the author describes Isaac demanding to know what his father was thinking. Mr. Calvin's dialogue describes the tense but comical conversation between Abraham and Isaac have on the awkward trip down the mountain.

= Artwork/Character Analysis: =

Isaac’s intuition causes him to feel betrayed and abandoned. When Isaac and Abraham reach the sacrifice area, Isaac notices there is no animal for sacrificing and states “’Father!’ … He said, ‘the fire and the wood are here but where is the lamb for a burnt offering?”’(Gen.22.8). Isaac understands that there is no “offering” and is left to conclude that the offering is him. His understanding of his fate must be heartbreaking. In Lodovico Cardi's painting “The Sacrifice of Isaac,” Isaac’s head is held low while Abraham holds a knife in the air, about to strike. The angel of God grasps Abraham’s arm to prevent the horrific event. Isaac’s pessimistic facial expression shows his depressed state and loss of hope for the situation. Being betrayed by one’s own father leaves him bereft. To have his idol and father figure stab him in the back, no pun intended, leaves Isaac feeling he has no one left to trust in the world.



Abraham’s melodramatic outlook on life emphasizes the blind devotion he has for God. In preparation for sacrificing his son, shown in “The Sacrifice of Isaac” by Lodovico Cardi, Abraham binds his son with one arm, while raising a knife powerfully and dramatically with the other, as the Angel of God comes to stop the horrific sacrifice. Cardi paints Abraham’s face overflowing with emotion to demonstrate the deep pain Abraham feels while carrying out his unthinkable deed. God understands Abraham will sacrifice everything to serve his God. With a despondent but obedient attitude, Abraham “bound his son Isaac, and laid him on the altar, on top of the wood” (Gen.22.9). When Abraham binds his son, God understands his orders have been carried out and knows that Abraham would sacrifice all that is important to him on earth in devotion to Him. Throughout history, protagonists yearn for followers that they can fully control.


 * [|Lodovico Cardi (Cigoli)] :** Lodovico Cardi, a painter and architect also known as Cigoli, spent most of his time studying art in Florence, Italy. Cardi littered his paintings with expressionism, which made his paintings stand out from other early painters. Expressionism rarely showed up in these times, but Cardi painted in the style anyway. The Grand-Duke of Italy employed Cigoli to paint "The Sacrifice of Isaac" and "Venus and the Satyr" in the Pitti Palace. Cigoli, a close friend of Galileo, painted stars and moons with Galileo himself. Cardi remains a recognizable painter with detail that still shocks viewers when they see his work today.

= Character Brainstorm: =

= = = = = Dialogue: =

Narrator : When Isaac and Abraham got to the place God showed Abraham, they collected wood for the offering God demanded of Abraham. Abraham bound Isaac, laid him on top of the wood, and took out his sharpened knife. As he reached up, the angel of the Lord called to him from heaven, and said:

(Dramatic music playing)

**Angel of God** : Abraham! Stop! I was JK!

Abraham : What? Don't you want me to do this?

Isaac : Dad! what are you doing?! Let me go! I thought you loved me! Please! (horrified) Just tell me why!

**Angel of God** : Do not harm him! You have obeyed me and I am relieving you of your terrible duty. Can't you take things a little less seriously?

Narrato r : Abraham lowered his arm and said: Abraham : Well this was kind of a serious matter...


 * Angel of God **: Always so serious...You need to learn to loosen your belt once and a while, take a few laughs.

Abraham : Ha ha ha....(sarcastically)

Abraham sacrifices an animal instead. (a cow moo-ing)

Isaac : Can we go home now? (about to break out in tears)

Abraham : Sure, sure, just unbind yourself and start packing up the supplies (nonchalantly). (To himself) If God were to let me on some of these 'jokes' I might live longer than my hundreds of years...Whew! Boy, do I need to open up a cask or two of wine tonight.

Narrator : On the way down from the mountain, Abraham offered to carry the supplies to try to lessen the guilt he had for almost sacrificing his son.

Isaac : So um dad...what were you going for back there...

Abraham : Well uh..err...I was pretending? (trying to lessen blow)

Isaac : You seemed pretty into it...

Abraham : The acting classes I'm taking from the village center are really helping out...

Isaac : I didn't know you took acting...

Abraham : Yeah, I'm really into it.

Isaac : So that ram you found to sacrifice was all...planned?

Abraham : Yep, picked it out and everything! (nervous laugh)

Isaac : Well, mom will sure looooooove your great acting feat.

Abraham : Woah, we're not gonna tell your mother. We'll keep this on the down-low, right, son? Love of my life, apple of my eye, my pride and joy?

Isaac : (silence) (crickets chirping)

Abraham : I mean if we keep it between us, there might be some... extra "wives" to go around, if you know what I mean.

Isaac : Dad! I'm fourteen!

Abraham : Well I'm just sayin', we want our family to grow...

Isaac : Stop dad, can't we just talk about this later?

Narrator : The rest of the trip was spent in silence as Abraham debated possible excuses for his wife, and potential bribes for his pouting son. (the sound of people and horses walking away and exiting music)

= Dialogue Analysis: = In his attempt to put a humorous side to the sacrifice of Isaac by Abraham, Mr. Calvin hopefully succeeds in getting a few laughs from the crowd (well, at least his mother laughed). Mr. Calvin tries to modernize the story by using slang such as "just kidding" and "apple of my eye". He incorporates the modern terms in such a way that the reader feels a connection between biblical times and the conversations they have in everyday life. Establishing personal connections in writing allows the reader to get more involved with the story and therefore enjoy it more. Calvin plays with God's personality by showing him as a joking character. When he tells Abraham to "take a few laughs" he implies that Abraham lives too stern a life and must loosen up. This demonstrates irony because God does not joke around, and certainly not about such a serious matter. As father and son walk down the mountain, Abraham tries to bribe his son to both relieve his guilt and hide his deed: "I mean if we keep it between us, there might be some... extra "wives" to go around if you know what I mean". The way he tosses around the word "wives" emphasizes two things. First, this quote backs up the double standard motif because Abraham speaks so loosely of women as objects. Also, the quote proves that Abraham actually does love his son because women, although treated badly, were a valuable commodity.

= Project Reflection: =

I enjoyed this project immensely because it allowed me to dig deeper into what I thought a real interaction between a father and son was like during biblical times. Relationships with fathers and sons nowadays sometimes lead to verbal battles and great tension. I felt that it would be funny if I took Isaac and Abraham's story and mixed comical tension into it. Recording the dialogue was not only a blast, but I learned new skills in the program garage band. However, editing proved a challenge to me when I looked to add noises because not all of them were on garage band. Analyzing both characters remained the hardest part for me throughout this project because the emotions I chose for both of them seemed obvious, even though I wanted to look for deeper meaning. = Sites =

code Anonymous. //Dramatic Knife//. N.d. JPEG file.

//Genesis//. 1962. 3rd ed. Oxford: Oxford, 2007. Print. Augmented Edition.

"Kill Your Son." Cartoon. //Wordpress//. Wordpress.com, n.d. Web. 20 May 2010. .

Pitti, Pallazo. //The Sacrifice of Isaac//. 1607. Oil on Canvas. Galleria Palatina.

Rembrant. //Sacrifice of Isaac//. N.d. Oil paint on canvas.

Wikipedia, dir. "Cigoli." //Wikipedia//. Wikipedia, n.d. Web. 20 May 2010. .

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